So I was just typed my name into google and randomly got directed to a pornography page. I spent the next few minutes thinking about several
different facets of sex. Some questions popped into mind.
Do you consider sex to be an act that takes place between two people who are in love? Aside from 'no sex before marriage' this is one of
the more traditional approaches to doing the deed.
Personally I believe this philosophy to be bunk. In my opinion sex is more an act of trust, rather than love. Yes, sometimes love/trust go hand in
hand but I mainly feel it is a trust or care issue.
Does anyone still believe in the 'no sex before marriage' doctrine?
Humans are sexual creatures? Is supressing desires for sex (Whether it be under the guise of religion or discipline etc) healthy?
Finally, I believe sex is the most fun two people can have together and people should do it more often. However, that's not to say people
shouldn't be responsible about it.
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posted on 2004-6-3 at 00:15
I personally feel like I need to know the person well enough to have sex with them. I don't think I could do it with someone I just met. I have
no problem with people doing this, it's just not for me.
I'd like to think it's a good thing that human beings take sex seriously. It's something that separates us from the animals. I
don't think it would be a good thing if we just let go of our inhibitions and went crazy.
I don't think it's exactly unhealthy to surpress their desires because of religious beliefs. If it is something you truly believe to be
important, it shouldn't be a problem. Human's can live without sex. I mean, sure when they get married, they could be completely
incompatable with eachother, but everyone is able to learn if they are willing.
Sure, sex is great and fun, but it can be harmful. So, like you said, if people are responsible about it, it's ok. Some people I know are
completely addicted, though. They will actually do anything for it. I mean anything. It's really a shame to see people like that,
because it can really fuck you up. My buddy is so bad he can barely function without it.
I guess it's all genetic. Certain people's sex drive are on overdrive 24/7 and some the complete opposite. Personally, I can go a long
time without it. It's always good, of course, but it's certainly not something I need on a daily basis.
Speaking of overdriven sex drives - do you think it's possible for a couple to have a normal relationship if a both or one person is like this?
I can't see anyone having a normal healthy relationship if sex is the number one factor in it. If I were a woman and I had a man like that, I
don't think I could ever trust him...and vice-versa. I would feel the urge to please the other just simply to keep them satisfied enough with me
so they wont cheat. I would bet you alot of the guys I know would fuck around on their girlfriends/wives given the opportunity.
I'll continue some thoughts when other people post...
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posted on 2004-6-3 at 01:12
I think sex should only be had if the two ppl are careful... one night stands would be scary of u dont know the person... there needs to be mega
protection no matter what.
The whole doing it with the one u love thing... ya sure, its wayyyyy more special that way
personally, i dont believe u have to do it with someone yur like gonna marry... as long as u do trust that person or whatnot and you're safe
about it, its fine.
and i agree, i dont think a relationship would work if one had a way larger sex drive than the other... it would be hard to trust in a way.
little_lady
Not quite as sad as the post count would suggest
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posted on 2004-6-3 at 01:27
.... That should some up how I feel about this thread already.
I've wanted to start a 'Sex related' thread for the longest time, but being the kid that I am, it would have looked wrong.
Jeff...thank you.
I'll come back either later on tonight or bright and early tomorrow to post my full thoughts. Right now is not exactly the best time for me,
I'm busy as fuck.
you won't let me down...
jessica
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posted on 2004-6-3 at 03:12
jeff, i think we've had a discussion similar to this before. perhaps not as in depth though.
i believe that sex is important for any human being. it's something special and intimate with a partner that cannot be replicated. it's
different every time. i think it helps to have compatible sex drives in a relationship, but not required. for me, i think sex has a few levels.
there's the purely physical level (aka "fucking") , and then there's a more meaningful level (aka "making
love"...although i hate it when people call it that). if i have a one night stand with some random, i'm getting something out of it, but
it's purely physical. if it's with someone that i love and trust then it's both on the physical and emotional level. in my
opinion, that's the best of both worlds.
on the subject of sex before marriage, i don't believe that couples need to wait. all the beliefs that sex should not happen before marriage
were relevant a long time ago when there was no effective birth control. it would be smart in those days for unwed mothers not to have kids for
purely social reasons. but i believe that in today's world where sex doesn't necessarily mean procreation, sex can happen before
marriage.
i think it's natural for everyone to have a sex drive and for those reasons i disagree with abstinence based on religious reasons. if someone
chooses to abstain for personal reasons, that's fine. but priests seem to have a problem controlling their sexual urges as we have seen exposed
in the news recently. abstaining is something that is somewhat un-natural to do and therefore can result in negative consequences. not necessarily
all the time, but i think people need to be careful. religion makes sex seem evil, when in fact i don’t believe that to be the case at all.
different people need different things. and there's probably always going to be someone out there that is looking for the same thing that you
are looking for. if you're really horny and you just want to do someone, i'm sure you can go to a club and find someone with that same
attitude. and if you want to find someone where the relationship is first and the sex is second, then i know that there are other people out there
looking for that too. it just all depends on what place you're at in your life. i don't think either is more "right" than
the other, it's just different situations.
anyway, that's my huge long opinion.
[Edited on 3-6-04 by jessica]
[Edited on 3-6-04 by jessica]
1lilrockerchic
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posted on 2004-6-3 at 12:59
supressing desires for sex healthy- yes i believe it is healthy because it is in our nature to have the desire for sex but the problem is when you
decide to realive these desires that can turn bad as some people have mentioned "the one night stand" now that is wrong I personally
believe that even if you truly love that other person that you shouldnt have sex because sex is one of the most important parts of a marriage. I
suggest you all read I kissed Dating good bye by joshua harris. even if you are dating some one it is still a good read and maybe just maybe it will
open your eyes about sex and why alot of people today are saving sex until marriage. But if you dont save sex until marriage, there are outcomes that
you might not be prepared for; like an unespected child, STD's, a bad break up, emotional hurting. If you keep having sex with other partners
you are just giving away some special that was meant for your husband/wife.
.::Lullaby::.
xX*I am sorry now (but will I ever let you go…)
Things seem so wrong (I had something worth living for)
I cant go on, but its something we’re suppose to do
My heart is crushed, now that I’m without you
I’m without you *Xx
Jeff K
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posted on 2004-6-4 at 06:22
Lilrockerchik, I'm not trying to diminish the potential importance of sex to the two people involved. All I'm saying is that after the
sexual revolution of the 20s sex was changed forever. Sex no longer meant procreation, it meant and still means pleasure.
It's cool to have beliefs regarding sex because as we've been over, it can be destructive. I'm just trying to have discussions
about different ways of thinking about it and I think we're off to a good start.
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posted on 2004-6-4 at 15:23
I understand where you are comming from. We all have our own point of veiws on this topic so i voiced mine, and everyone else who posted here did too.
.::Lullaby::.
xX*I am sorry now (but will I ever let you go…)
Things seem so wrong (I had something worth living for)
I cant go on, but its something we’re suppose to do
My heart is crushed, now that I’m without you
I’m without you *Xx
Jeff K
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posted on 2004-6-4 at 16:03
Here's an add on to the discussion. Jess and I had this convo a little while ago too.
What about pornography? This is actually a more complex issue than most think. Some arguments against pornography are that it devalues women's
position in society by portraying them as objects there only to please men. Many also see it as morally reprehensible and corruptive. Pornography
develops addictions in many people.
On the flip side. Nowadays there is porn directed at women, where men are the focus of the films. Also, pornography is frequently used as a marital
aid to help struggling couples be intimate. The stars of the adult film industry are there by choice and most highly enjoy their jobs. Does this
change anything?
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posted on 2004-6-4 at 16:36
Fuck, I was racking my brain and I had a few paragraphs, but I erased it. I'll have to rethink about this later. My brain clearly isn't
running at full capacity this afternoon.
Jessica, I can't agree more how much I hate the term "making love". I can't say that I have ever said that before. I just
cringe.
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posted on 2004-6-5 at 02:33
although i believe that many people don't read too much into porn, if you think about it and what it represents it can be somewhat disturbing.
there is more porn directed towards women now adays. however, generally, pornography has been the subjectification and objectification of women.
i'm not saying that sex on tv is bad. i'm not saying that at all. but porn is directed to please men and the images are those of male
gratification using the woman's body at whatever cost. humiliation, pain, and disrespect are all part of what makes porn what it is. i'm
not saying it's pure evil but i think that the industry of pornography and what it represents needs to be seriously questioned.
jessica
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posted on 2004-6-5 at 02:33
oh.....and you guys are right.....sex can be very very fun!!
Jeff K
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posted on 2004-6-5 at 04:30
Humiliation and pain Jess? I'm not sure what porn you're watching but 'mainstream' pornography rarely incorporates
humiliation, the performers are there because they want to be. Also, while there is pornography that uses images of pain you have to seek this sort
of thing out if you want to see it.
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posted on 2004-6-5 at 20:32
quotation:Originally posted by Rob
sex is fun!
hahahahaha that was awesome
1lilrockerchic
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posted on 2004-6-5 at 21:03
quotation:Originally posted by Rob
sex is fun!
Very straight forward!
it can be fun at times!
.::Lullaby::.
xX*I am sorry now (but will I ever let you go…)
Things seem so wrong (I had something worth living for)
I cant go on, but its something we’re suppose to do
My heart is crushed, now that I’m without you
I’m without you *Xx
DeeDee
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posted on 2004-6-6 at 03:28
this is very true
Jeff K
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posted on 2004-6-6 at 06:25
It's too bad there's a time limit on editing because I realize I didn't think that last post through carefully enough. I think
I've clarified my position to myself a lot in the past few days.
A lot of disgusting and often humiliating acts are performed on camera every day. Most of these acts involve both men and women The fact that there
are people who drive this industry, does not make it right. Although there is no doubt it will continue, it is still morally reprehensible.
