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Author: Subject: Movies
Pure_Ibanez_Sound
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posted on 2004-1-28 at 20:30
No Gigli in the Oscar Nominies... The people who pick the nominies must've accidently forgot to put the name down. Or maybe you copied it wrong Chris. Hmmm

[Edited on 28-1-2004 by Pure_Ibanez_Sound]





one last show.

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mr. dobalina
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posted on 2004-1-28 at 20:30
i dont know when he's gonna do a new one again. but if you put his name into the search engine of your choice, you can see the ones he's done in the past. there aren't many.





Amid the chaos of that day, when all I could hear was the thunder of gunshots, and all I could smell was the violence in the air, I look back and am amazed that my thoughts were so clear and true, that three words went through my mind endlessly, repeating themselves like a broken record: you're so cool, you're so cool, you're so cool. And sometimes Clarence asks me what I would have done if he had died, if that bullet had been two inches more to the left. To this, I always smile, as if I'm not going to satisfy him with a response. But I always do. I tell him of how I would want to die, but that the anguish and the want of death would fade like the stars at dawn, and that things would be much as they are now. Perhaps. Except maybe I wouldn't have named our son Elvis.

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little_lady
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posted on 2004-1-28 at 20:33
Oh lord....Gigli nominated for an Oscar?
Excuse me....just a second.

(falls off chair and laughs her head off)

*Sits back on chair and types*
I'm sorry, I gotta pull myself together!





you won't let me down...

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mr. dobalina
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posted on 2004-1-28 at 21:02
this is going to be the second year in a row where a large portion of the movies to win will be comprised of movies that no one went out and saw [last year's the pianist, the hours, etc].

i'm not going to predict winners for upcoming oscars because i learned from a very young age that no one thinks like the academy, and that the academy is often wrong.





Amid the chaos of that day, when all I could hear was the thunder of gunshots, and all I could smell was the violence in the air, I look back and am amazed that my thoughts were so clear and true, that three words went through my mind endlessly, repeating themselves like a broken record: you're so cool, you're so cool, you're so cool. And sometimes Clarence asks me what I would have done if he had died, if that bullet had been two inches more to the left. To this, I always smile, as if I'm not going to satisfy him with a response. But I always do. I tell him of how I would want to die, but that the anguish and the want of death would fade like the stars at dawn, and that things would be much as they are now. Perhaps. Except maybe I wouldn't have named our son Elvis.

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little_lady
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posted on 2004-1-28 at 21:17
The Pianist was soooooo good. Adrian Brody's nose really bugs me though, I feel like re-building him one.
The Hours had Nicole Kidman in it, didn't it?...





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mr. dobalina
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posted on 2004-1-28 at 21:19
and julianne moore [hotty]





Amid the chaos of that day, when all I could hear was the thunder of gunshots, and all I could smell was the violence in the air, I look back and am amazed that my thoughts were so clear and true, that three words went through my mind endlessly, repeating themselves like a broken record: you're so cool, you're so cool, you're so cool. And sometimes Clarence asks me what I would have done if he had died, if that bullet had been two inches more to the left. To this, I always smile, as if I'm not going to satisfy him with a response. But I always do. I tell him of how I would want to die, but that the anguish and the want of death would fade like the stars at dawn, and that things would be much as they are now. Perhaps. Except maybe I wouldn't have named our son Elvis.

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little_lady
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posted on 2004-1-28 at 21:36
Very much so.






you won't let me down...

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mr. dobalina
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posted on 2004-1-28 at 23:03
that list of alleged academy nomination reminded me of another movie that no one saw, but should have.

"american splendor", nominated under best screen adaptation, is an amazing movie. the academy really surprised me with that nomination, they're really starting to represent all types of movies nowadays. keep up the good work.





Amid the chaos of that day, when all I could hear was the thunder of gunshots, and all I could smell was the violence in the air, I look back and am amazed that my thoughts were so clear and true, that three words went through my mind endlessly, repeating themselves like a broken record: you're so cool, you're so cool, you're so cool. And sometimes Clarence asks me what I would have done if he had died, if that bullet had been two inches more to the left. To this, I always smile, as if I'm not going to satisfy him with a response. But I always do. I tell him of how I would want to die, but that the anguish and the want of death would fade like the stars at dawn, and that things would be much as they are now. Perhaps. Except maybe I wouldn't have named our son Elvis.

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SideO_JR
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posted on 2004-1-28 at 23:23
i just saw magnolia, what a crazy movie





How do you communicate those emotions that are so intense that no physical expression or series of words can even scratch the surface?

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armour_guitarist
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posted on 2004-1-29 at 03:04
im interested in this guys other reviews too.

i saw Rotk a week before it came out in theaters, cause i have connections, and when i came home that night, there were already like 30 reviews on the internet... i read most of them, but none where nearly as good as this one. good job Dobs!

[Edited on 29-1-04 by armour_guitarist]





Some things take more than a lifetime.

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mr. dobalina
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posted on 2004-2-1 at 02:52
Mr. Cumpston's review of the second matrix movie........... it's a shame i dont agree with him on anything. i just like reading his reviews.

MATRIX: KINGDOM OF ASS-KICKING
Review by Neill Cumpston

Jim-Jammity Jesus Krispy Kreme Christ on a twat-rocket, this movie blew me apart and put me back together only after I’d got put back I felt like I had thirteen dicks and they’d all gotten blown by a surfer chick with 26 heads (2 mouths on each cock). I will see it ten times and if I see Star Wars George or that gay Batman director butt-hole any time during the ten screenings here comes Mr. Punch.

This is the sequel to the MATRIX Movie that came out four years ago and after seeing it I can say I could have waited another four years it is that fucking good. This movie is a pillowcase with soda cans inside that beats the living mule-fuck out of you but you’re all like, “Bring it on honky tonk” because the beating feels like summer and Halloween and Cheetos at the same time. This movie is Mad Max’s shotgun-gun from ROAD WARRIOR, only it shoots ass-kicking only at jocks. This movie is tits!

WARNING: THIS PARAGRAPH IS ABOUT THE PLOT AND IT’S BORING AND THERE’S NO ASS-KICKING IN IT BUT I USE THE WORD “FUCK” THREE TIMES TO HELP GET THROUGH IT

I still don’t get the plot of the first one, and this one’s all talking about “choices” (over and over again to where you think you’re watching that fucking Chicktime network) and “prophecies” and especially words like “anomaly” and “exile” (and who the fuck even knows what those words mean?) and there’s this long speech at the end that I also didn’t get. Also, you find out all this deep stuff, like about The Cookie Lady from the first movie and they introduce all these other characters like a Key Guy and a Frenchie Dude and another Frenchie but guess what it’s okay ‘cuz the other Frenchie’s a chick and she’s got cleavage you could hide a rump roast in and also this ex-girlfriend of Murphus and there’s this new guy on the ship flying it around, I think he’s from OZ (don’t worry, no butt rape). And Neo and Memento Babe are all PDA every second, and they also “do it” and one time I thought I saw Memento Babe’s nip but it was one of those metal ring things that everyone’s got on ‘em so no jacking off when the DVD comes out.

NOW ALL ASS-KICKING UNTIL THE END
So that’s the plot but here’s the thing: you could wear headphones and listen to Dio during this whole movie and you wouldn’t miss anything, there’s so much ass-kicking going on. That Smith Dude is back, only now he can make more Smith Dudes and do they each know how to kick ass? Like a Heroclix collector knows how to not get pussy. Plus he’s got this other ability that’s really fucking scary and I think it might have something to do with the next movie.

ASS-KICKING #1: Neo fights those Blues Brothers-looking dudes and it’s pretty fucking cool. But it’s just a teaser, like when they have pictures of the food at Jack in the Box, and the tacos look all good in the picture, but then you get some and they look like they got pooped out of a pig. But you eat ‘em because there’s fries coming. In this movie there’s ALWAYS fries coming. 6.

HEADS UP: There’s a lot of boring stuff between Ass-Kicking 1 and 2. There’s a sermon by the dude who was in OMEGA MAN, and this underground dance thing that looks like if Pottery Barn had a rave on the Planet of the Gay Apes – but the rave thing is where Neo and Memento Babe “do it”. I am bringing my headphones when I see this again on the 15th.

ASS-KICKING #2: Neo and a Kung Fu Phooey go at it in a picnic restaurant. They kick over a big thing of chopsticks, which is kind of cool, and Kung Fu Phooey wears these cool little sunglasses, but that’s it. 5. And then Neo and Cookie Lady talk. Then chiggity-check your rectum ‘cuz here comes:

ASS-KICKING #2: This fight on a playground where like a hundred Smith Dudes are whomping on Neo like a fat girl eating Fiddle Faddle – it’s that intense. Holy shit. The thing goes on for like five minutes and just when you’re thinking, “Fuck you Star Wars George” it goes on for another five minutes and then Neo flies away like that Greatest American Hero dude. 10.

ASS-KICKING #3: Neo, Murphus and Memento Babe go to a French restaurant in the Matrix and there’s this French dick and you’re thinking, “Fuck you for not supporting us against Egypt”, and then Neo goes whomp-ass happy on the dude’s cohorts while Murphus and Trinity free this Key Dude and fight these Edgar Winter guys with dreadlocks who can turn into ghosts. 8.

HERE’S WHERE I WISH THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE ONLY HAD THE WORDS “HOLY” “FUCKING” AND “SHIT”
ASS-KICKING #4 – 28: That’s right, this next scene feels like 24 ass-kickings. Seriously, the rest of the summer is going to suck busboy cock for ketchup packets compared to this scene.

HOLY
Murphus and Memento Babe have to escape on a huge freeway (which is a no-no in the Matrix; “It’s suicide!” says Memento Babe, or something like that I can’t remember for sure) while the Ghost Guys chase them, plus the Smiths, who keep taking over the drivers on the freeway and they’re shooting and everything’s blowing up for miles and

FUCKING
Memento Babe has to go against the traffic on a fucking motorcycle and they keep trying to smash her and Murphus takes out the Ghost Guys in this totally cool way and the fucking samurai sword and the head-on crash and

!!!SHIT!!!
the fucking Blues Brothers guys and razors and swordfight on top of a truck and Memento Babe flying through the air and out of nowhere Neo and I am out!!of!!cum!! 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10

And there’s a whole other ass-kicking after this, which I can barely remember because, seriously, that fucking chase scene. It’s now #2 on my list of all-time chases, ahead of ARK RAIDERS, where Blade Runner gets dragged behind the Nazi truck (#5), and then DYING IN LOS ANGELES, where CSI is driving the car against the traffic (#4) and then TAXI RONIN, where Taxi Driver guy goes the wrong way down that French tunnel, and also because they keep running over French people (#3), and now MATRIX, right behind BANDIT AND THE FAT GAY GUY 2, where all the police cars and all the trucks play chicken out in the desert (#1).

Neo needs to fight Blade and that fat bald guy from STIR CRAZY.

Then Murphus and Neo and Memento Babe try to raid some sort of central something, like the CPU in TRON, something like that. Smith Dude re-appears, Neo has a talk with a new character, someone dies and someone’s reborn. Then something gets destroyed (good), something else gets destroyed (bad), and Neo discovers a new power. Then something BIG gets destroyed (really really bad), and someone lives who shouldn’t.

MY HINT: Stay through the credits and you get to see a trailer for MATRIX: YOU WILL SHIT, the third movie.

That’s it. Best movie of the year. I still want to see HULK-MAN and the werewolf thing and I think there’s something where you get to see a hot Asian’s boobs, but they’re not going to get close to this one. Here’s my blurb if they’re putting blurbs in ads:

“MATRIX: KINGDOM OF ASS-KICKING is like if all of Anthrax’s albums formed into a hot chick who had to fuck you ten times a day or she gets pee-cancer.”
Neill Cumpston

[Edited on 1-2-04 by mr. dobalina]





Amid the chaos of that day, when all I could hear was the thunder of gunshots, and all I could smell was the violence in the air, I look back and am amazed that my thoughts were so clear and true, that three words went through my mind endlessly, repeating themselves like a broken record: you're so cool, you're so cool, you're so cool. And sometimes Clarence asks me what I would have done if he had died, if that bullet had been two inches more to the left. To this, I always smile, as if I'm not going to satisfy him with a response. But I always do. I tell him of how I would want to die, but that the anguish and the want of death would fade like the stars at dawn, and that things would be much as they are now. Perhaps. Except maybe I wouldn't have named our son Elvis.

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Sin Ogaris
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posted on 2004-2-1 at 03:31
I guess all I can say to that review is... to each his own. :/

I don't understand why everyone got all wowed by the Freeway scene, it wasn't THAT good. The two ghosts died in a really crappy way and there was just an overall half-arsed feel to it. Kinda my look at the whole movie.

In my mind they tried to make it TOO philosophical in 2 and 3 and ended up falling flat on their faces.

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mr. dobalina
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posted on 2004-2-1 at 03:36
i hated both of the sequels...... i actally fell asleep during that 'hundred mr smith's' scene. fell asleep.

mind you, i'm an asshole when it comes to big-budget franchises.


watch "the triplets of belleville".





Amid the chaos of that day, when all I could hear was the thunder of gunshots, and all I could smell was the violence in the air, I look back and am amazed that my thoughts were so clear and true, that three words went through my mind endlessly, repeating themselves like a broken record: you're so cool, you're so cool, you're so cool. And sometimes Clarence asks me what I would have done if he had died, if that bullet had been two inches more to the left. To this, I always smile, as if I'm not going to satisfy him with a response. But I always do. I tell him of how I would want to die, but that the anguish and the want of death would fade like the stars at dawn, and that things would be much as they are now. Perhaps. Except maybe I wouldn't have named our son Elvis.

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Sin Ogaris
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posted on 2004-2-1 at 03:54
I'm sure everyone has already seen it, but if you haven't watch Se7en, very eye opening film. Great acting (this was actually the film where I started to notice Brad Pitt is a damn good actor, then Fight Club and Snatch just confirmed my beliefs) from the two main characters (Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman), and who can forget John Doe, that speech in the car, it's absolutely incredible. Couldn't expect any less from Kevin Spacey though.

Speaking of him, Usual Suspects is an awesome film, I own it on DVD and try to watch it at least once a week, much like all the DVD's I own.

American History X is also a good film, very graphic, but that's the way of today. It stars Edward Norton (probably my favourite actor followed closely by Kevin Spacey, Brad Pitt and a myriad of other impressive people) and Edward Furlong. It's about a Neo-Nazi gang and how a few years in jail can completely change a person.

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armour_guitarist
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posted on 2004-2-1 at 07:55
Peter Jackson just came to Santa barbara today to recieve the "Modern Masters" award, awarded by the Santa Barbara film festival. i went tonight to see it. first he talked a little bit about each film he has made, and they showed a clip from each one. then John Clease (who lives here himself) gave him the award, and a stuffed Kiwi. it was quite humorous. Sean Astin, Liv Tyler, and Elijah Wood where also there.

i was very dissapointed that he didnt talk about his film "Forgotten Silver" though. it is a hilarious mockumentary about a filmmaker from newzealand. I own it on DVD. but if you rent it (and i highly recomend you do) try to get it on video, cause the video version has a brilliant short film at the end that is not encluded on the dvd.





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mr. dobalina
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posted on 2004-2-1 at 11:37
i just re-watched the film Amelie for probably the 15th time.

if you have ever wanted to see a director of photography earn his esteem, watch this movie. no big explosions, just incredible filmmaking.

when you watch it, look for the exaggeration of colours in each scene.





Amid the chaos of that day, when all I could hear was the thunder of gunshots, and all I could smell was the violence in the air, I look back and am amazed that my thoughts were so clear and true, that three words went through my mind endlessly, repeating themselves like a broken record: you're so cool, you're so cool, you're so cool. And sometimes Clarence asks me what I would have done if he had died, if that bullet had been two inches more to the left. To this, I always smile, as if I'm not going to satisfy him with a response. But I always do. I tell him of how I would want to die, but that the anguish and the want of death would fade like the stars at dawn, and that things would be much as they are now. Perhaps. Except maybe I wouldn't have named our son Elvis.

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Paige_x0x
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posted on 2004-2-1 at 17:36
Amelie is probably one of the best movies I have ever seen. I watch it with my friend Alexandra everytime we get together. We also watch LOTR, A Midsummer Nights Dream, The Matrix, Sleepy Hollow, and Twelfth Night all in the same visit. We're movie freaks.





The night's as hot as hell. It's a lousy room in a lousy part of a lousy town - I'm staring at a goddess. She's telling me she wants me. I'm not going to waste one more minute wondering how I've gotten this lucky. She smells like angels ought to smell, the perfect woman... the Goddess. Goldie. She says her name is Goldie.

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Chris
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posted on 2004-2-1 at 18:33
http://maddox.xmission.com/c.cgi?u=matrix2
http://maddox.xmission.com/c.cgi?u=matrix3

gotta respect the guy, even if he does think he's a pirate.





ta bi

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RobH
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posted on 2004-2-1 at 21:10
"the triplets of belleville" is playing at a small theatre about a block from my house this month. Maybe I will check it out.





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mr. dobalina
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posted on 2004-2-2 at 20:52
i think you should. either you think it's awesome, or you think i'm an absolute nutbar. i pray it's not the former. sometimes i'm too artsy for my own good when it comes to movies.

i just watched "the professional" for the 8,401st time. even to today's standards, it's brilliant. plus, it's got natalie portman. i had the biggest crush on her when this movie came out. it's never really gone away.





Amid the chaos of that day, when all I could hear was the thunder of gunshots, and all I could smell was the violence in the air, I look back and am amazed that my thoughts were so clear and true, that three words went through my mind endlessly, repeating themselves like a broken record: you're so cool, you're so cool, you're so cool. And sometimes Clarence asks me what I would have done if he had died, if that bullet had been two inches more to the left. To this, I always smile, as if I'm not going to satisfy him with a response. But I always do. I tell him of how I would want to die, but that the anguish and the want of death would fade like the stars at dawn, and that things would be much as they are now. Perhaps. Except maybe I wouldn't have named our son Elvis.

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little_lady
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posted on 2004-2-2 at 20:55
I watched "Bruce Almighty" last night...hoping it would "cheer me up" instead, it made me sadder...

There's some lines in there that made me think a lot about relationships...shitty.





you won't let me down...

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posted on 2004-2-3 at 02:22
I am dying to go and see Ginger Snaps II...

I love the movie AND the cookie!

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Paige_x0x
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posted on 2004-2-3 at 02:27
OMG I can't *wait* to see Ginger Snaps 2! The first one is one of my favourite movies EVER! I have been waiting a looooooooooooooooooooong time for a sequel to come out. There's supposed to be a third one coming out very soon. Hooray!





The night's as hot as hell. It's a lousy room in a lousy part of a lousy town - I'm staring at a goddess. She's telling me she wants me. I'm not going to waste one more minute wondering how I've gotten this lucky. She smells like angels ought to smell, the perfect woman... the Goddess. Goldie. She says her name is Goldie.

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Kimbits
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posted on 2004-2-3 at 02:29
I THIRD one????


*gasp*


I wonder what would happen...

OMG...they are such great movies..I think that they are scary..but then again..I'm a baby





All of my life..will I believe?

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Paige_x0x
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posted on 2004-2-3 at 02:35
really?! lol i think they are funny. But I like to laugh at other peoples misfortunes.

The 3rd movie is supposed to be a prequel sort of. It's like Ginger and Bridgette in their past lives. It takes place in the 1800's I think. They go to this village and it is under attack by two werewolves or something. If I can find a summary on the interenet again I will post it.





The night's as hot as hell. It's a lousy room in a lousy part of a lousy town - I'm staring at a goddess. She's telling me she wants me. I'm not going to waste one more minute wondering how I've gotten this lucky. She smells like angels ought to smell, the perfect woman... the Goddess. Goldie. She says her name is Goldie.

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